Love letter # 327

I saw what happened tonight. You walked into that room, mask in place – your persona so charming – everyone smiling. I watched as your lips formed the words – but I caught the corner of your eye.

You were like an actor in there, following your director’s orders. Say it like you mean it. Like this, like that. No one will know. No one wants to know – because nobody really gives a fuck. Yeah, I see your barely disguised disgust. You play the game without believing it and you wish you had the guts not to. Behind the painted smile: concealed weapons.

When you came outside I recognised the tiredness in your breath – your unseeking gaze. Please don’t see me. No more fucking questions. So I finished my cigarette and let you be. I get that you like the quiet – because the silence is an absence of bullshit.

Perhaps you’re thinking: who is this vain fool pretending to know me? But at least I’ve got you pinned for a liar.

Most people live life like a vanity project. You’ve done that, I can tell – but now you’ve grown up. At some point – maybe not so long ago – you came to the inescapable conclusion. You know the one.

Even glory becomes a pile of bones. Beauty turns to ash. And no trophy on earth is worth even a single drop of love.

That’s why you came outside – and why I’m saying this. Because if I’m wrong it won’t matter. But if I’m right …

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