Love letter # 283

To this day I remain astonished at your choosing of me. Grateful for the shine in your smile. Amazed by your continued nearness. Whenever I stop to behold it, I am afloat on the sea of your beauty. Lifted up by the advent of your light. I swoon to your song and, in such musical company, I move to the rhythm of the vastness – and in that lovely cadence it feels as though I blend with you and will never, ever be alone. There is nothing I could give back to you that would even come close to emulating this extraordinary gift; the one you unveil with every feather of your touch.

Love letter # 402

Was this how it was?

When we were together they could never hurt us. In our world there was no language – simply recognition. The song that played deep inside your heart was singing its heart out in mine.

Was that it – or did I make it up? Now I’ll never know. Just believe.

For by believing I can feel those arms around me. Sense that magic on the surface of my skin – little bumps, hairs on end. As though time had not flown. Doors not closed.

It may be a delusion – but what a gorgeous mirage to thirst for.

Here in the desert, I dream of flowers. Close my eyes and smell them. And in the ordinary walk of life, I am only ever a thought of you away from the presence of wonder – and therefore transformed.

Because, at the nearing of the hour, it will be joys such as these I shall ponder – and they shall fill the void with beauty. As you once did.

Love letter # 335

It was through your beauty that I fell upon these things. On pleasant rambles unearthed. Dug from dark marrow and plucked into light. Always there – yet now known to language.

These twin axes – the poles around which my life has danced – I have no more words to deny them. Eternity and mortality.

All my great loves, my lofty vaults of thought, the very beholding of infinity I have credited myself with – all this wrapped in fragile, failing flesh. In poor eyes and creaking hips. In freezing bones and coughing fits. The song of forever in a moment of breath. A scratched up atom of the everlast.

For this is what I know when I am with you. When your beauty is too much for ordinary ideas.

The mortal eternal: this is I. All of forever and nothing at all.

It is to these mirrored gods I surrender – because as I yield to the mortal, so too I bow to the eternal. As I accept nothing, I shall have everything once more. It shall reside in my breath – and ring the bells when I see you. I shall be cleansed in the light that you bring – ready to be dirty again.

To such beauty I surrender. As I have to you, my love. As I have to you.