Love letter # 98

I confess: there are days when I wish I had never opened the door to you. These are the days when I miss you so much I ache all over – the days when all the distractions do nothing to take my thoughts away.

Days like today.

But mostly, I thank the stars I once held you; that there were nights when we hid beneath the sheets. How lucky I was to kiss your beautiful mouth. To know your skin. These little treasures made me richer.

I am the like the lottery winner, the peasant who caught the eye of the queen. Your graces could have fallen upon much greater men, but they came instead to me – and I have never been the same.

Even when I am riven, faint with blood loss, weak with hunger – even as I pray for oblivion – I remember how blessed I am to have known you so.

And on bittersweet days like this, when I so stupidly long for you…these too are diamond hours.