Love letter # 85
Yesterday, a friend of mine asked, “does it ever go away?” and I had to say that it didn’t. Even now, after God knows, my breath still catches.
I could not, with any confidence, nominate the precise moment when you carved your name inside me but I can tell you now the letters still bleed. It’s not that I pine it’s just that I catch myself with your gestures; beautiful tricks you taught me. And I think to myself – ah, there she is.
It’s then that I understand – you might be a lifetime away but you are always here. Part of me is constructed of the things you once gave so freely. To this day, they are the better parts.
Maybe I don’t miss you at all. Maybe days go by when I don’t think of you but when I do … it is like wine … and just for a moment I am giddy again, whirling around with you.
So yes, it never goes away. It just becomes a river – feeding all that rain back into the sea.