Love letter # 44

Away from all the fuss and noise, all the vanity and bluster there is a simple, inescapable truth. I wish I’d known it sooner.

I put ego ahead of love. I let ‘me, me, me’ posture and preen. I mouthed the selfish mantras of the age – until my greed was all that was left to greet me.

You spoke of a world suffused with kindness and warmth and incredible beauty. I spoke about ambition. You filled the rooms with spirit and joy and dancing. I filled my time with reasons.

I am not looking for your forgiveness. Nor do I seek to play down the staggering breadth of my arrogance and folly. I fought for this empty palace, after all. Its hard walls make awful echoes now; a steely sound without your song around.

I know that I cannot buy back the time I stole from you and I accept that even this apology is scarcely more than an ill applied band aid – but I want you to know that I was the mad one and you were absolutely right.

Keep that beautiful heart. Treasure it. It’s what marks you out from the rest of us. It’s why you shine.

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